The funny thing about life

Reflection of life is a wonderful thing for those who have lived it for all it's worth.  I laugh to myself when I look to the skies for answers, and they actually come to me.  Too many times I have asked the old man upstairs for guidance or questioned his reasoning for leaving me behind on this Earth after Beth passed away.  It wasn't until 2003 that I realized I wasn't going to die anytime soon.  Here we are, 2011, and I am still here, except now I trust his judgment for my future.  I actually appreciate the guidance I get when I ask him questions.  I was just standing outside asking who am I supposed to meet, or what am I supposed to do?  And immediately the wind blew a gust that froze me up, but I was laughing.  It was almost instantaneously connected to my questioning his grand plan.  The other night the same thing happened.  I sat outside the pub smoking a cigarette and was about to leave, but the skies opened up and the rain began to pour down.  It forced me to stay at the pub, which allowed me to meet some very interesting people of all ages.

The other thing I often question are the women in my life.  My mother obviously raised me right in terms of how I treat women.  The only downside is I often break their hearts, but it's for the best in the long run.  If my love for them is not enough to sustain a healthy relationship, then in my eyes, we will end much more horribly later on down the road.  These thoughts in no way apply to any current situations, it is just a generalization over years of my life and the reflection of what I have seen, felt, done, and dealt with in the past.

I am now putting the two notions together and starting to see a pattern.  Not only do I question life, the reasons for being here, and the women that cross my path, but also the ideas of fate, destiny, and/or karma.  Even though this blog might seem scattered, it is some of the things I am thinking about at the moment.  I actually look at my current situation as being exactly as the way it is supposed to be at this very moment in time.  I am uncertain of my future, and still very uncertain of what the old man actually wants from me.  The one thing I do know is that we are communicating more and more over the past few years.  This talks have increased in nature, and responses have also come in terms of signs.  Well, do not mistake this blog for a religious sermon, because everyone knows I am not religious, but spiritual. 

The question I used to get was what was the difference between religion and spirituality?  Well, I will just say that spirituality is for those that have been to hell and don't want to go back.  Whereas religion is for those that decide being saved first makes more sense.  It is my hard head that makes the second choice impossible.  I need to learn things the hard way.  Does it make me any better than my fellow man/woman?  NO, it does not, I would actually classify it as being worse off because it takes me longer to get the same place as them.  Anyway, life is good, and this blog was about the comedy I find when I ask for a little guidance.  The truth is, reflection helps me to have to ask for this guidance.

That is all I got about that today.  As for life itself, well I had an interview today that went really well.  I have another interview on Tuesday, and also some good leads to follow up on later next week.  I think I am on the right track, and I feel good about my decision making process.  If the weather gets warmer, then I will be absolutely golden.  I will keep you posted.

Kenny